{"id":2453,"date":"2019-07-29T11:01:41","date_gmt":"2019-07-29T11:01:41","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/screening.mhanational.org\/article\/i-destroy-everything\/"},"modified":"2024-04-05T15:00:25","modified_gmt":"2024-04-05T19:00:25","slug":"i-destroy-everything","status":"publish","type":"article","link":"https:\/\/screening.mhanational.org\/es\/content\/i-destroy-everything\/","title":{"rendered":"\u00a1Lo destruyo todo!"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Sometimes it feels like we can\u2019t do anything right. <a href=\"https:\/\/screening.mhanational.org\/es\/content\/i-am-a-failure\/\">Everything we touch seems to fall apart<\/a>\u2014relationships, projects, goals, all of it. What\u2019s going on here, and what do we do about it?<\/p>\n<h2>Self-sabotage<\/h2>\n<p>As strange as it may seem, people often intentionally undermine their own goals. This is called <strong>autosabotaje<\/strong>. Usually we don\u2019t even realize we\u2019re doing it. Here are a few reasons why people self-sabotage:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>We feel unworthy:<\/strong> if I think I don\u2019t deserve happiness, I might feel like I\u2019m doing the world a favor by making myself unhappy.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Repressed emotions:<\/strong> I may be bottling up my negative emotions because they\u2019re uncomfortable, or because I\u2019m in an environment where I\u2019m not \u201callowed\u201d to express them. Unfortunately, this doesn\u2019t make them go away. Instead, they build up until they\u2019re too intense to keep inside\u2014and then we explode, usually in a destructive way.<\/li>\n<li><strong>We take it out on our loved ones:<\/strong> A lot of the time those bottled-up emotions come out when we feel most comfortable\u2014and that\u2019s usually around the people we care about the most.<\/li>\n<li><strong>We\u2019re reliving trauma:<\/strong> people who have lived through a very frightening or stressful experience often get stuck thinking about it. They might even try to recreate the situation to feel in control.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Fear of success:<\/strong> You might feel like once you\u2019ve succeeded once, people will have higher expectations for you. If you don\u2019t succeed in the first place, you can avoid that pressure\u2026 but at a high cost.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Caring can be stressful:<\/strong> A little stress can be a good thing\u2014it keeps us focused on our goals, and reminds us of what&#8217;s important to us. But too much stress makes us lose focus.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>A lot of these are related to our mental health. Finding coping skills that help us manage our emotions can be really helpful. If you think you might be struggling with a mental illness, <a href=\"https:\/\/screening.mhanational.org\/es\/screening-tools\/\">Realice una de nuestras pruebas de salud mental.<\/a> and spend some time learning about <a href=\"https:\/\/screening.mhanational.org\/es\/content\/how-can-i-improve-my-mental-health-my-own\/\">how to improve your mental health<\/a>.<\/p>\n<h2>Listening to your self-talk<\/h2>\n<p>Take a second and think about that sentence: \u201cI destroy <em>everything<\/em>.\u201d I bet if you think about it, you can come up with some examples of things you\u2019ve done well. Maybe your loved ones can help you think of times you made other people happy. Thinking about this logically might help a bit\u2014or, it could be totally missing the point.<\/p>\n<p>Ultimately, \u201cI destroy everything\u201d doesn\u2019t come from the logical part of our brain. It comes from the emotional part. We say things like this about ourselves when we\u2019re feeling a lot of emotions but don\u2019t know how to describe them. Try to put a label on exactly what you\u2019re feeling. Here are some ideas:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Frustration:<\/strong> I\u2019m having a hard time achieving my goals.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Confusion:<\/strong> How can the results of my actions be so far from my intentions?<\/li>\n<li><strong>Helplessness:<\/strong> I can see how I\u2019m self-sabotaging, but I can\u2019t seem to stop\u2014I feel out of control.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Despair: <\/strong>Will it ever end, or is this just how I am?<\/li>\n<li><strong>Shame:<\/strong> It feels like everyone else has their life in order\u2014what\u2019s wrong with me?<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Learning to understand and communicate your emotions is the first step to learning to manage them. Once you can do that, you can start to change the way you talk to yourself, and think about where to go from here.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sometimes it feels like we can\u2019t do anything right. Everything we touch seems to fall apart\u2014relationships, projects, goals, all of it. What\u2019s going on here, and what do we do about it? Self-sabotage As strange as it may seem, people often intentionally undermine their own goals. This is called self-sabotage. Usually we don\u2019t even realize &hellip; <\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a href=\"https:\/\/screening.mhanational.org\/es\/content\/i-destroy-everything\/\" class=\"more-link\">Seguir leyendo<span class=\"screen-reader-text\"> &#8220;I destroy everything!&#8221;<\/span><\/a><\/p>","protected":false},"author":7,"featured_media":0,"template":"","age_group":[23,100,19],"condition":[90,82,84,86,35],"class_list":["post-2453","article","type-article","status-publish","hentry","age_group-11-17","age_group-over-18","age_group-under-11","condition-addiction","condition-adhd","condition-bipolar","condition-depression","condition-loneliness"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<title>I destroy everything!<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/screening.mhanational.org\/es\/content\/i-destroy-everything\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"es_MX\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"I destroy everything!\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Sometimes it feels like we can\u2019t do anything right. Everything we touch seems to fall apart\u2014relationships, projects, goals, all of it. What\u2019s going on here, and what do we do about it? Self-sabotage As strange as it may seem, people often intentionally undermine their own goals. This is called self-sabotage. 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