I can’t focus!

Not being able to focus can make life so much more difficult. It makes it hard to accomplish tasks.  It makes it hard to get things done correctly. Everything suffers when we can’t focus, including our confidence. It’s difficult for everyone to focus at some point in their lives, especially if a lot is happening around us. But it’s possible to find ways to both focus and cope.

Why is it hard to focus?

Our lifestyles can make it hard to focus

Have you ever found it difficult to focus when hungry or tired? Sometimes, our lifestyle can have an impact on how well we focus and can make us feel distracted. We constantly have distractions in this life we live—with our phones, our computers, social media, and advertising. Everywhere we look and just about everything we do anymore causes distraction.

First things first!  Let’s stop beating ourselves for not being perfect. Practicing self-compassion and giving ourselves a little grace is very important. We are humans, not robots. Make stress reduction and self-care a priority. We are worth it!

ADHD symptoms can make it hard to focus

Not being able to focus is also commonly a sign of having ADHD – attention deficit hyperactivity disorder. Symptoms of ADHD, like the inability to pay attention, hyperactivity, and impulsiveness, can all make focusing difficult. These symptoms can cause us to be late or lose and forget things. They can cause problems at work, frustration or anger, problems organizing, and with our mood.

Living with ADHD can also be hard on relationships because others may not understand how these symptoms make it difficult to focus. The frustration from the symptoms can be debilitating. We might get irritable when people cause us to lose focus or lose our train of thought. It can be very irritating to forget what we want to say, lose something, or just plain can’t focus. This can lead to negative thoughts about us and affect our trust in ourselves and our self-esteem.  It can cause others to lose confidence in us as well.

How can I focus better?

Sometimes, it seems next to impossible to try to manage these symptoms and get our lives together. But there are some things we can do to help. For example, reducing stress, using coping skills, and getting good sleep greatly help. Some of these may have been tried before but don’t give up. It takes practice and perseverance to create new habits.

To help with focusing on tasks, we can:

• Start small. Break larger tasks down into smaller ones so that they are not as overwhelming. Baby steps always count toward a goal.
• Use a timer. It helps us to focus when we know there is a deadline. Set it and give ourselves time to work until it goes off.
• Have an accountability friend. If we know that we have something urgent that needs to be done then we can have someone remind us, check in on us to check progress, or help with any obstacle that may come up.
• Set reminders. Set reminders everywhere so that they can get our attention. Planners, wall calendars, phone alarms, and desk calendars are important for staying on top of our schedules.
• Create our organization system. Make habits of where things are placed and reorganize the home if necessary. Put big, noticeable key rings on the keys and use tracker devices for remotes, keys, and other trivial things that get lost.
• Learn to say no. It’s okay to get back to someone about scheduling and saying no helps us not get overscheduled. Being overscheduled cuts out self-care time and causes more anxiety and stress.
• Develop structure and routine. It helps to know what we are doing each day. This does not have to be absolute, but it helps stay on schedule.
• Learn to pause. Learn to count to five before interrupting someone or responding. Learning to pause takes a lot of practice but it can be done.
• Set realistic goals. We do not want to set unrealistic expectations for ourselves and set ourselves up for failure. Success will give us more confidence.
• Avoid multitasking. Focus on one thing at a time. It helps improve focus and accomplish more.
• Remove distractions. Cleaning up clutter from the desk and surroundings can remove distractions from your space and help you focus.

If you think you have experienced symptoms of ADHD, it may help to take an ADHD test. This can validate your symptoms and give you a place to start when you are ready to talk to a mental health professional. Having untreated ADHD can make a person want to give up.  But there are ways to manage ADHD.  It takes practice to form a habit, and it’s okay if we make mistakes along the way. We just have to keep trying!