Just Checking In on friends

A version of this article was originally posted on the IDONTMIND Journal.

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Things are tough right now. It may feel harder than ever to ask how someone is actually feeling or to start a conversation about their mental health. But sometimes — you just have to ask.

Introducing Just Checking In: ten simple questions to check-in with your friends and family. You can do this over the phone, on FaceTime, or even six feet apart — and it only takes ten minutes.

A few quick things to keep in mind:

  • Spend as much time as you want on each question.
  • Stay engaged with follow-up questions.
  • Keep things judgment-free.
  • You don’t have to be an expert, you just have to listen.
  • Stay in touch after, and don’t be afraid to connect them to resources.

We’d explain more, but…you get it.


  1. How are you feeling today, really? Physically and mentally.
  2. What’s taking up most of your headspace right now?
  3. What was your last full meal, and have you been drinking enough water?
  4. How have you been sleeping?
  5. What have you been doing for exercise?
  6. What did you do today that made you feel good?
  7. What’s something you can do today that would be good for you?
  8. What’s something you’re looking forward to in the next few days?
  9. What’s something we can do together this week, even if we’re apart?
  10. What are you grateful for right now?

You did it! Wasn’t that nice? Now pick someone to call tomorrow and pay it forward.

Keep it going

You can use these same questions with every person in your life, multiple times.

Check-in with yourself

Don’t forget that this check-in can work on your own, too! You can’t help other people if you aren’t checking-in with yourself, so go ahead and ask yourself these questions and answer honestly.

Connect to resources

Don’t worry if you don’t have the perfect response — just be you and be an active listener. You can always connect them to resources on our Journal or Find Help pages after your check-in.

You got this

If you feel a little nervous about having a conversation with someone about their mental health, check out Just Talk About It or Listen Up.

Share it on social

We want to hear about your conversations! Screenshot your Just Checking In video chats and post to your social channels. Tag @idontmind and use the hashtag #justcheckingin.

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