Do I have to go to 12-step to quit?

It’s completely understandable why you might not want to go to 12-step. Maybe there’s trauma associated with it, you had a bad experience, or hasn’t worked for you in the past. Maybe you have resistance to it because it’s incredibly overwhelming to be substance-free. All of this is okay.

Twelve-step offers a structure and framework as well as the support of a community—as long as you work through the steps. For many, it’s a helpful way to stay on track with recovery. Others may want or need something different.

It’s okay to not go through a 12-step program for your recovery journey. But it’s important to make sure that whatever path you decide to take for your recovery that it fulfills you mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.

While you don’t have to go to 12-step to quit, you should have an alternative. Having support, especially if you’re early in your recovery, can help you meet people with similar experiences and learn more about yourself. Whatever you do, remember that you are alone.

What is going to 12-step like?

Going to 12-step offers many benefits for those in recovery. The people you meet there become like a supportive network, family, or team. Being a part of a group like 12-step can fulfill your human need to be a part of a group. It offers a sense of belonging and a space where you can find your authentic self, grow, and develop. You can make new friends, connections, and even find new job opportunities. You can also find a sponsor and additional support people.

Keeping an open mind to the program can help keep you coming back and working the steps for your healing. The rituals you learn there can help replace the bad habits you developed while in active addiction. Twelve-step also connects you to a higher power—God, nature, the universe, etc.—that you can lean on and give you hope during difficult times and when you need it.

While there are many benefits of 12-step, it’s also important to remember why you are there: to stay focused on your recovery. You may meet people who you may want to create friendships or relationships with, but remember to stay focused on your healing and relationship with yourself. It can be easy to try and fill the void that addiction left with something else, so having boundaries is important. If you experience a recurrence or relapse, you can come back anytime. No matter what’s going on in your life, you can always come back and keep trying. Being aware of your vulnerability can help you when you’re in a tough spot.

Finding alternative programs

For many people,12-step programs are not an option. For example, people who aren’t religious may want to find programs not rooted in Christianity. Others may want a recovery option that honors their cultural background and practices. Some people may want to work one-on-one with a counselor to address their addiction and other issues in their lives. Or maybe 12-step just didn’t work for them, and they just want to find something new.

There are many reasons why 12-step may not work for someone. You don’t have to attend a 12-step program if it isn’t right for you. There are many alternatives available to help you with your recovery journey.

Some options include:

• Pagan and other religious recovery programs (ex: some places of worship offer programs)
• Secular and non-religious recovery programs
• Addiction and/or mental health support groups
• Drug and alcohol counseling and/or therapy
• Charities and nonprofits
• Local mental health centers and peer support
• Finding substance-free activities like classes, hobbies, and clubs

Here are a few ways to find alternative options:

• Call the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration (SAMHSA) hotline 24/7 at 1-800-662-HELP (4357) to learn about options for counseling.
• Call 211 at any time to get information about local resources offering counseling and shelter, food, and financial assistance.
• If you have one, ask your healthcare provider or insurance carrier about options.
• Do a Google search. You can try something like, “Recovery programs near me.”
• Ask around. Some people in your circle may have heard of alternatives to 12-Step.

No matter how you choose to do your recovery, the journey is yours. You don’t have to take the route and direction that anyone else does. You just have to keep going.